Classic Personal Ads

A Tale of Two Cities - Bomberman

Sydney Carton, your favorite character because of attitude throughout book and sacrifice at end. Connect with me more than other characters because most relateable. Beaten down by a life of failure. Most human character. Looking for thoughtful soul to share in my tragedy.

Moby-Dick - Scott Peeples

Call me Ishmael. Looking for eclectic reader to accompany me on whaling voyage. No experience required. Passion for blending non-fictional info with fictional narrative. Help me name a major coffeehouse chain... possibly Starbuck? Hunting Leviathen with obsessive captain Ahab.

The Long Goodbye - John Monroe

Private Eye seeks a looker who can hold her liquor. Marlowe, Philip; 38; Los Angeles. Interests: Poetry, money and moral goodness. Hobbies: Single-player games of chess, making fun of people who are too unintelligent to catch on and getting arrested for no apparent reason. Please send resumes to 6351 Hollywood Boulevard, Suite 615, 90028.

Candide - John Siewert

Think you've had it rough, you have no idea. Naive glutton for punishment looking for someone to share the best of all possible worlds with. Must supply the best of all possible worlds.